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Posts Tagged ‘sliding doors’

 

I travelled up to the North East of England recently to see my wife’s parents. My wife (Laura) had travelled up a few days earlier, so I made the journey up in our car on my own. It reminded me when we were first dating & she was studying in Sunderland, whereas I was working in Liverpool. I’ve got fond memories of our long distance relationship. More so, considering most people seem to believe they don’t work.

I realised back then I hadn’t yet been diagnosed with any mental illness. So although I had suffered from, at least depression, I was blissfully unaware that was what it was. I never knew what I wanted to do, work-wise, back then, but I was confident I could turn my hand to most things. So I suppose my outlook was ‘the world is my oyster’ kind of thing. After just six months since I left Uni I had paid off my credit card debt on only £150 a week wage. I was confident I’d soon be in a job where I’d be earning at least the national average. At which point I would then start making repayments on my student loans. Meh, I never got there (there being the national average wage) in the end, but hey-ho that’s life.

It got me thinking of those ‘sliding doors’ moments in all our lives, where you think what if… My what if, is how would my life be different if I didn’t have a mental illness.

I know a lot of people say ‘I don’t believe in regrets. Everything in life has made me who I am today’. Which is fine, but come on, most of us have done something we regret & if we could change it we would. Personally I think it’s fine to have regrets, but the important thing is not to dwell & stew over them. It’s the past, you can’t change it so what’s the point.

What are your ‘What if’ moment?

 

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You always hear people say things along the lines of “I never regret anything blah… or everything I’ve been through has made me what I am today blah… I agree with those sentiments to some extent, but it seems like the onus on having a regret has to be a bad a thing. I don’t think it is. Life is full of choices so every time you make one you g down a different path. I find it fascinating to think of those choices & what your life might be like if you took some different choices in the past. It’s one of the reasons I like the film Sliding Doors so much.

When I read today’s challenge I immediately thought of the choice I made upon finishing University. A friend I lived with in my final year mentioned in last couple of months whether I was interested in going backpacking for a few months in summer. I think we were talking about Thailand initially & then see were things took us. I was tempted, but I had met Laura about two months prior. In the end I didn’t go & neither did my friend, but that is a big “What If…” in my life. You’ve probably read on some of my previous posts how I really want to travel properly one day.

I hope I get to do it!

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