Posts Tagged ‘Job’


I travelled up to the North East of England recently to see my wife’s parents. My wife (Laura) had travelled up a few days earlier, so I made the journey up in our car on my own. It reminded me when we were first dating & she was studying in Sunderland, whereas I was working in Liverpool. I’ve got fond memories of our long distance relationship. More so, considering most people seem to believe they don’t work.

I realised back then I hadn’t yet been diagnosed with any mental illness. So although I had suffered from, at least depression, I was blissfully unaware that was what it was. I never knew what I wanted to do, work-wise, back then, but I was confident I could turn my hand to most things. So I suppose my outlook was ‘the world is my oyster’ kind of thing. After just six months since I left Uni I had paid off my credit card debt on only £150 a week wage. I was confident I’d soon be in a job where I’d be earning at least the national average. At which point I would then start making repayments on my student loans. Meh, I never got there (there being the national average wage) in the end, but hey-ho that’s life.

It got me thinking of those ‘sliding doors’ moments in all our lives, where you think what if… My what if, is how would my life be different if I didn’t have a mental illness.

I know a lot of people say ‘I don’t believe in regrets. Everything in life has made me who I am today’. Which is fine, but come on, most of us have done something we regret & if we could change it we would. Personally I think it’s fine to have regrets, but the important thing is not to dwell & stew over them. It’s the past, you can’t change it so what’s the point.

What are your ‘What if’ moment?



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It’s coming to the end of my temporary rolling contract & my mind keeps looping to ‘What if I lose my job?’. I’m fairly confident that it will be renewed, as we’re well into the summer holiday season & there is plenty of work right now.

That said, the worry is still lingering at the back of my mind, mainly because this job seems to work with my bipolar really well. As a postman, I get daily exercise, a mix of cycling & walking for four hours each day. I also get to work outdoors enjoying plenty of fresh air & interacting with the public. So if I do lose my job I think I’ll struggle to find one that helps with the bipolar side of things.

Soooo it came as a nice surprise yesterday, when the subject of my contract renewal came up at work. Now my manager isn’t one for words of encouragement, so when he said ‘Well you haven’t got any worse’, I thought, steady on boss let’s not go all out on the praise here :). To be fair he also said I’d gotten better & was performing my rounds quicker. I still didn’t get confirmation I’ll be getting a new three month contract, but the positive feedback was…well…positive 🙂

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Really good news! I got the extension in my contract. It was due to run out on 27th December 2012, but now its extended until 28th March 2013.

I didn’t realise it but it had been playing on my mind more than I thought. I feel much more relaxed with work now. The other bonus is I can enjoy Christmas without worrying about finding a job.

I hope you’re all doing well or at least better than you may have. Sorry for not commenting on your blogs. I have skim read, but I don’t have much time at the moment.

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Yep, that tumble weed above pretty much sums up my blog this last week. I haven’t posted since last Sunday. Bad Graham!

The main reason for this is work I suppose. Still getting used to working & as it involves a lot of walking & cycling I’m ‘over tired’ when I get in. Also I’m reading a good book at the mo & that’s eating into my spare time too.

Well I’m up early for a Saturday 05:40! I wasn’t planning on getting up until 07:00 (work today 😦 ). I did have a really intense dream involving my brothers though. My two older brothers don’t really get on well together. They haven’t from a young age. The eldest bullied the younger one when they were kids & that’s basically where it it all stems from. Anyway in my dream we were all together (a rare occasion) & the brother I get on well with (the younger one…but older than me…so I suppose we can call him the middle one…or Dave seeing as that’s his name) starting acting strange. He hit one of his kids for messing about & although my nephew was being naughty it didn’t warrant being hit. Anyway I blew up at Dave for this & ended up clocking him right on the kisser. That was the end of the get together.

That was the end of that part of the dream & yes Dave I pretty much knocked you out, so at least that reflects reality 😀

Anywhoozles that random post will suit for my return. I hope you haven’t missed me too much? Plenty of comments & likes saying you have will only fuel my ego…

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I came to Mark Twain’s quote all on my lonesome in Secondary school. Whilst being very introverted & with little friends I realised one day on the way into school that I tend to worry about lets say 10 things. In that given day only 1 or 2 of those things would actually happen. So I suppose you could say I’m wiser than Mark Twain…what no?

Anyway to get back on topic, I suppose I’m worried a little about my new job. It tends to be the last thing I think of before beddy bobos & first thing I think of when I wake up. I’m not overly worried, just the usual new job jitters.

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First the good news…

I mentioned a number of posts back that I had some good news, but I couldn’t really share it at the time. Well the news was I had resigned from my job! It was office based & unfortunately it was in a stressful environment that wasn’t conducive to my bipolar. I was only there for two and a half years & had around 10-14 months off sick. I put that down to a mixture of work related stress & also the fact that recently it turns out my meds haven’t been right for some time.

So after having a heart to heart with Laura we decided to hand in my notice & start looking for part time work. Laura has been doing really well in her job over the last couple of years & she has recently been given a promotion, so it has given me the chance to ease back on my hours & see if it helps with my bipolar. I got a new job this week as a postman. I’d been interested in this position for a few years, but never really considered it seriously. Well I saw a job posting & went for it. two days later it was mine, with immediate affect.

Now this leads on to the funny news…

Today was my first day & I was out and about as you do a s a postie, delivering mail… I was walking out of one driveway when …whooooossssshhhhh…my legs are in the air & I’m coming down hard on concrete, scattering mail like confetti all around me. I literally went arse over tit! After gathering my bearings, I realised I’d slid on dog shit. God damn the fucking owner who didn’t bag that piece of shit up! To add insult to injury a toddler was being pushed in her pram, in my direction, had seen the whole sorry affair & was laughing hysterically. As I was picking my mail up thanking my lucky stars none of it landed in the doggie excrement, I noticed the pram pusher trying really hard not to laugh. This actually made me laugh, as if I’d seen what happened I would have laughed openly & only then thought to conceal my outburst at someone else’s misfortune.

So there you have it some good news, some funny & a little bit painful news.

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